求搞笑的英语短剧

Question

不能太短的短剧，要是英文的，对话要多，不能太多旁白或是道具。别太难，人不能太多，最好有中文解释，不过没有也行啦~~
要是剧本撒……

Answer 1

阿甘正传的片断

FORREST (voice-over) That Momma, she sure was right.
It's funny how things work out.
EXT. BAYOU LA BATRE/BUBBA'S MOM'S HOUSE - DAY
Forrest walks up to a shack on the edge of the Bayou. A group of black kids play in the front yard.
FORREST (voice-over)
I didn't stay home for long, because I'd made a
promise to Bubba. And I always try to keep my promise.
So I went on down to Bayou La Batre to meet Bubba's
family and make their introduction.
Bubba's mother named MRS. BLUE and her other children look at Forrest.
MRS. BLUE Are you crazy, or just plain stupid?
FORREST Stupid is as stupid does, Mrs. Blue.
MRS. BLUE I guess.
EXT. BUBBA'S GRAVE - DAY
Forrest steps over to Bubba's tombstone.
FORREST (voice-over)
And of course, I paid my respect to Bubba himself.
FORREST Hey, Bubba, it's me, Forrest Gump. I remember
everything you said, and I got it all figured out.
Forrest pulls out notes from his pocket.
FORREST I'm taking the twenty-four thousand, five hundred
and six-two dollars and forty-seven cents that I got...
EXT. BAYOU - DAY
Forrest walks across a yard where men are cleaning shrimp.
FORREST (voice-over)
... well, that's left after a new hair cut and a
new suit and I took Momma out to real fancy dinner
and I bought a bus ticket and three Doctor Peppers.
Forrest walks along a wooden pier. Forrest pays an old black shrimper a large wad of cash.
OLD SHRIMPER Tell me something. Are you stupid or something?
FORREST Stupid is as stupid does, sir.
EXT. BUBBA'S GRAVE
Forrest stands at the grave.
FORREST Well, that's what's left after me saying, "When I was
in China on the All-America Ping-Pong Team, I just
loved playing ping-pong with my Flex-O-Ping-Pong Paddle."
Which everybody knows it isn't true, but Momma says
it's just a little white lie so it wouldn't hurt nobody.
So, anyway, I'm putting all that on gas, ropes and new
nets and a brand-new shrimpin' boat.
EXT. BAYOU - DAY
Forrest steers his shrimping boat. The boat is old and rusty. Forrest unleashes his nets as his catch of the day drops to the deck. It is a bunch of garbage and shells. Forrest picks up one shrimp.
FORREST (voice-over)
Now, Bubba had told me everything he knows about shrimpin',
but you know what I found out? Shrimpin' is tough.
EXT. DOCKS
Forrest pulls a couple of shrimp out of a bucket.
FORREST I only caught five.
OLD SHRIMPER A couple of more, you can have yourself a cocktail.
The old shrimper begins to walk away, then stops and looks at Forrest.
OLD SHRIMPER Hey, you ever think about namin' this old boat?
FORREST (voice-over) I'd never named a boat before,
but there was only one I could think of.
Forrest paints a name on the side of his boat. The name is "Jenny."
FORREST (voice-over)
The most beautiful name in the wide world.

灰姑娘
白 :Long ago, there lived a girl. Her mather had died and her father had married again,His new wife had two daugters. They are so bad as their mother. The poor girl had to work day and night. She must sleep in the kitchen. She weared drity clothes. All of them called her cinders for Cinderella. However, we’ll show you a different play today.
(灰姑娘昂首挺胸帅气十足地上场)
旁白 ：She is so strong, and smart. Especially she is good at sport.
Now, she is running for the 100 meter race.(灰姑娘冲刺,旁边老师读秒:11’9)
Now, she is playing basketball.(灰姑娘以一敌众,轻松灌篮)
Now,she is practicing Chinese gongfu(灰姑娘打拳,对手倒)
This is her----Cinderella
灰姑娘(怒,看旁白) :Do you finish?
旁白 :Ok(结巴)continue, even she is perfect, she still can’t escape the poor life, Why? That is-----
继母(假装洗衣服) :How cold the water! I’m too old to do anything, My leg is so painful.
(灰姑娘默,从继母手中拿过洗衣盆)
(一姐将盆碗碰得乱响.灰姑娘默,从姐手中拿过盆碗)
(一姐手持针线缝衣,刺手,尖叫—灰姑娘默,从姐手中拿过衣服)
第一幕
(灰姑娘在帮后母按摩肩膀)
二姐(奔入,扬动手中传单) :Mom, Mom, Look! There are some leaflets. I got them on the street.
The King is having a party. The Prince will look for a wife.
一姐(托腮) :I must be choosen, I am the most beautiful girl in the world.
二姐(凭空跳舞) :No, Not you. I have the charming shape, I am the Queen.
(两姐争吵起来,继母从女儿手中拿过传单,亲吻)
继母 :Oh, baby. Stop. You two are the most beautiful girls in our country. He will probably choose one of you. Come on , make up yourself. We haven’t enough time!(瞪灰姑娘)Cinderella, what are you doing? Come here, help your sisters!
灰姑娘 :OK, I will. But, mom, can I go to the party tonight? I want to ------
(三人敛神)
一姐 :Oh, my God! I forgot Tim’s homework. He gave us a lot of homework.. I can’t finish, what should I do ?
二姐(拿书,指,附和) :Oh, Yes, Yes. Look, execise A, excise B, excise C, excise D, excise E, Oh, planning tree, essay, study plan------(偷瞄灰姑娘,哭)Oh, my God! Oh, my party! My Prince! My happyness! and the country’s future!
灰姑娘(慌乱,安慰) :My sisters, don't cry! I always do the homework for you, of course tonight!
(母女三人一通忙乱后) : Goodbye, our lively girl!
第二幕
(魔女骑着一把几乎掉光了的扫把登场)
旁白 :Oh, 哈里波特!
(魔女撞到灰姑娘)
灰姑娘(怒) :Who are you ?
魔女(得意) :I am the best witch, and the most beautiful witch. I can give you all the thing you wish.
灰姑娘 : Really? Do you kown King’s party? I want to go, but------(低头看自己的破衣服)
魔女(大笑) :Don’t worry. It is easy for me! Look, clothes, shose,car-----
灰姑娘(面露欣喜,扑向鞋子) :Oh, how beautiful glass shoses!
魔女 :Wear it, and go !
第三幕
(富丽堂皇的大厅里,音乐飘扬,人声鼎沸.女士们翘首以待)
侍卫(击杖) :Welcome the Prince.
(鼓掌,欢呼)
国王(严肃) : Please be quiet! As everybody knows, today I will chooes a beautiful, slim, homorous, and long hair girl for my son----(转身,指向王子),handsome, strong, tall, and brave!
(王子做害羞状)
众女士 :How lively! How handsome! (做陶醉状,冲向前,将王子团团围住)
(此时,飞出一女,持扇 “杀出一条血路”)
(王子与灰姑娘共舞,突然手机铃声响起)
王子 :Who’s phone?
灰姑娘 :Oh, it’s my phone!(掏手机边跳舞,边接电话) This is Cinderella, speaking!
魔女 :It 12’clock, game will be over, come back quickly!Or you’ll change back!(开始敲钟)
灰姑娘 :Oh, I must go!(慌忙中跑,掉了一只鞋)
王子(检起鞋,追) :Wait! You forget give me you name, and you phone number!
王子(注视姑娘远去,悲情) :I’ve lost her!
第四幕
旁白 : Since the party, Prince fall in love with Cinderella, the Prince decided to look for the mysterious girl. He issued a proclamation, “Whoever the glass shoe fits, shall be wife to the Prince!”
(王子带着士兵到处找人试鞋)
士兵 :Please try the shoe!(女士甲试鞋) Oh, your foot is too big!
士兵 :Please try the shoe!(女士乙试鞋) Oh, my God, what a terrible smell! Of coures not you !
旁白 :A t lat, the Prince come to Cinderella ‘s home.
(两姐站在门口,花痴状) :Oh, the Prince is coming, he is so handsome! He is so cool!
士兵(拿着鞋) :Please try the galss shoe.
(两姐妹正抢): Oh, it is my shoe! ------Oh, it is my shoe!
(士兵夺过鞋,递给大姐): You first!(大姐拿过鞋,却怎么也穿不进去)
士兵 : Stop doing that. You foot is too long, you will break the shoe!
二姐(得意) :I said, it is my shoe.(抢过鞋,试穿,费了九牛二虎之力终于穿上,走开来)
二姐 : ****, too small!(甩掉鞋,蹲下揉脚,鞋飞到灰姑娘身上)
继母(怒吼) : Why are you here? Back to kitchen! Wash the dishes!
士兵 : Wait! Every girl must try !
继母 : She is drity! It is couldn’t be her!(灰姑娘默,轻松的穿上了鞋)
王子(欢呼) :Oh, it fits! I found you !(王子和灰姑娘拥在一起)
旁白 :The Prince was delighted to found her, and on a bright sunny day, he and Cinderella were merried. They lived happily ever after!

Answer 2

美国派，性喜剧，蛮好

Answer 3

我说我说我说
美国家庭滑稽录像！！！！！！！！！！！
不搞笑我割脉！