要几个简短的英语绕口令加翻译，或者英语笑话加翻译。

Question

不要太难读，笑话一定要搞笑。

Answer 1

1情书
小伙子在给女朋友的信中写到：“爱你爱得如此之深， 以至愿为你赴汤蹈火。星期六如不下雨，我一定来。
love letter
Guy in the letters to his girlfriend wrote: "love your love so much, that would like to give you go through hell. On Saturday as it does not rain, I'll come.

2迟了
在地铁里，一位男子发现扒手正在掏他的钱包，便幽默地说： “老兄，你来晚了！我今天虽然领 了薪水，但我太太下手比你快 多了！”
late
In the subway, a man found pickpocket is cutting his wallet, and humorously said: "man, you came to night! I today although took salary, but my wife lay more quickly than you!"

3
Bobby Bippy bought a bat.鲍勃比皮买了一个球拍
Bobby Bippy bought a ball.鲍勃比皮买个一个球
With his bat Bob banged the ball 鲍勃用他的球拍击球
Banged it bump against the wall 把球猛的打到了墙上
But so boldly Bobby banged it 但是鲍勃用的力气太大了
That he burst his rubber ball 以至于把球打爆了
"Boo!" cried Bobby “波！”鲍勃哭了
Bad luck ball 倒霉的球
Bad luck Bobby, bad luck ball 倒霉的鲍勃，倒霉的球
Now to drown his many troubles 现在，为了解决他的麻烦
Bobby Bippy's blowing bubbles. 鲍勃波比使用了鼓风球

1. Can you can a can as a canner can can a can?
你能够像罐头工人一样装罐头吗？
2. I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won't wish the wish you wish to wish.
我希望梦想着你梦想中的梦想，但是如果你梦想着女巫的梦想，我就不想梦想着你梦想中的梦想。
3. I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice-cream!
我叫喊，你叫喊，我们都喊着要冰淇淋!
4. How many cookies could a good cook cook if a good cook could cook cookies?
A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who could cook cookies.
如果一个好的厨师能做小甜饼，那么他能做多少小甜饼呢？一个好的厨师能做出和其它好厨师一样多的小甜饼。
5. The driver was drunk and drove the doctor's car directly into the deep ditch. 这个司机喝醉了，他把医生的车开进了一个大深沟里。
6. Whether the weather be fine or whether the weather be not.
Whether the weather be cold or whether the weather be hot.
We'll weather the weather whether we like it or not.
无论是晴天或是阴天。
无论是冷或是暖，
不管喜欢与否，我们都要经受风霜雨露。
7. Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
Where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
彼德派柏捏起一撮泡菜。
彼德派柏捏起的是一撮泡菜。
那么彼德派捏起的泡菜在哪儿？
8. I thought a thought. But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought.
If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn't have thought so much.
我有一种想法，但是我的这种想法不是我曾经想到的那种想法。如果这种想法是我曾经想到的想法，我就不会想那么多了。
9. Amid the mists and coldest frosts,
With barest wrists and stoutest boasts,
He thrusts his fists against the posts,
And still insists he sees the ghosts.
雾蒙蒙，冰霜冻，
手腕儿空空，话儿涌，
只见他猛所拳头往柱子上砸，
直说自己把鬼碰。
10. Badmin was able to beat Bill at billiards, but Bill always beat Badmin badly at badminton.
巴德明在台球上能够打败比尔，但是打羽毛球比尔常常大败巴德明。
11. Betty beat a bit of butter to make a better butter.
贝蒂敲打一小块黄油要做一块更好的奶油面。
12. Rita repeated what Reardon recited when Reardon read the remarks.
当里尔登读评论时，丽塔重复里尔登背诵的东西。
13. Few free fruit flies fly from flames.
没有几只果蝇从火焰中飞过去。
14. Fifty-five flags freely flutter from the floating frigate.
五十五面旗子在轻轻漂浮的战舰上自由的飘扬。
15. There is no need to light a night light on a light night like tonight.
for a bright night light is just like a slight light.
像今夜这样明亮的夜晚，就不需要点一盏夜灯，因为明亮的夜灯也会变得微弱。
17. A pleasant peasant keeps a pleasant pheasant and both the peasant and the pheasant are having a pleasant time together.
一位和气的农民养了一只伶俐的野鸡，而且这位和气的农民和这只伶俐的野鸡在一起度过了一段很美好的时光。
18. How many sheets could a sheet slitter slit if a sheet slitter could slit sheets?
如果裁纸机能裁纸的话，一个裁纸机能裁多少张纸呢？
19. Mr. See owned a saw and Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw before Soar saw See.
西先生有一个锯，萨先生有一个秋千。现在在萨先生看见西先生之前，西先生的锯锯断了萨先生的秋千。
20. If you're keen on stunning kites and cunning stunts, buy a cunning stunning stunt kite.
如果你非常相要好的风筝和精彩的表演，就去买一只漂亮的，灵巧的风筝吧。
21. Ted sent Fred ten hens yesterday so Fred's fresh bread is ready already.
特德昨天给弗莱德送去了十只母鸡，所以弗莱德的新鲜面包已经准备好了。
22. A Finnish fisher named Fisher failed to fish any fish one Friday afternoon and finally he found out a big fissure in his fishing net.
一个名叫费希尔的芬兰渔民在一个星期五的下午未能捕捉到任何鱼，结果他民现他的渔网上有一个大裂口。
23. Franc's father is frying French fries for his five fire-fighter friends after they finished a fire-fighting in a factory.
在结束对一家工厂的灭火战斗以后，弗兰克的父亲在为他的五个消防队员朋友炸制法式土豆(炸薯条)

Answer 2

绕口令
i saw a man saw a log with saw。我看到一个人在用锯子锯原木
Beware!
That is a bear lair.
I would not go in there on a dare.
In there is where a bear scared Pierre.
Pierre was not aware of the bear in the lair
Until the bear gave a glare and Pierre ran from there.
小心!
那是熊窝。
我不敢闯入其窝、
熊在那里惊吓了Pierre
Pierre看到了熊那刺眼的眼光，
他才意识到那是熊,然后Pierre从那里拼命往外逃.

A big bug hit a bold bald bear and the bold bald bear bled blood badly.
大臭虫打了冒失的秃头的熊，冒失的秃头熊鲜血拼命往外涌。
Brandy bandaged the bear.
捆绑了熊.
The bold bald bear who bit the bold bald bear.
On the shoulder on the boulder And made the bold bald bear on the boulder bawl.
这头冒失的秃头熊打了在圆石头上的冒失的秃头熊，把圆石头上的冒失的秃头熊揍得使劲吼。
Big boxes of bears being brought aboard.
好大一箱熊，要被带上船。
笑话
1)TOM'S EXCUSE
Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?
Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go
Slow".
汤姆的借口
老师：汤姆，您为什么每天上学迟到？
汤姆：我每次路过拐角，一个路标上面写着："学校----慢行。"
DID YOUR DAD...
2)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!"
and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
吉姆说:"你妈妈能!"
附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点.
3)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!"
and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
吉姆说:"你妈妈能!"
附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点.
4)A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
5)Mother sent Tommy to the store across the street to buy a good box of matches.When Tommy came back,mother asked him,”Did you buy a good box of matches?”
“Yes,Mum.”Tommy replied,”I have tried them all.”
一盒小火柴
妈妈让汤米去马路对面的商店里买一盒好用的火柴。汤米回来后，妈妈问他，“你买的是好用的火柴吗？”
“是的，妈妈。”汤米回答，“我把它们都试过了。”
6)Father:Uh,oh,I think I just made an illegal right-hand turn.
Susie:That is okay ,dad,the policeman behind you just did the same thing!
开车
父亲：哎呀，我刚才违规右转弯了。
苏西：没事，爸，跟在你后面的警察也这么转了。
7)Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”
“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.
“You’er a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are tow cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?”
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆。”他回答说。“你真是一个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说. “再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
8)Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?”
“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan.
“Would you recognize him if you sew him again?”asked his mother.
“I’d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”
他的耳朵在我的衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口。”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说，“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里。”

Answer 3

百度啊