请找100字英语小短文

Question

请找5段英语小短文，在100字左右，并给出翻译！速度啊，我很急的，如果可以找到，我会给Q币作奖励！！！
要翻译啊，翻译！最好在7年级的水平，不然太难得我不会读！

Answer 1

My report
I have received my report card. I did OK this time.
My Chinese said I was very hard and my reading was very good.
But my Math told me that I was lazy .That wasn't true , I only found that it was too diffcult for me to work out some questions.
My English was very good. I was very happy.
I wasn't surprised that my worst report was from my music teacher he said that I was not good at singing .I think he was right.
I will harder after.
我的成绩
我已经收到了我的成绩单,我这次做得不错.
我的语文老师说我非常努力并且我的阅读很不错.
但是我的数学老师告诉我我是懒惰的.那不是事实,我只是发现有些题对于我来说很难解决.
我的英语不错.我很高兴.
我一点也不吃惊我最差的成绩来自于我的音乐老师,他说我不善于唱歌.我想他是对的.
我以后会更努力.
I work for 7up"! 我可是在七喜公司工作呀
Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says, "Congratulations, you got twins." The man said "How strange, I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says

"Congratulations, you got twins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's wrong? I work for 7up"!

四个好朋友在医院里碰面了,他们的妻子正在生产.护士过来对第一个男人说:"恭喜,你得了双胞胎."男人说:"多奇怪呀,我是明尼苏达双子队的经理."过了一会儿,护士过来对第二个男人说:"恭喜,你得了三胞胎."男人很喜欢:"嗯,又巧了.我是3M公司的董事."最后,护士跑来对第三个男人说:"恭喜,你得了2对双胞胎."男人很开心地说:"真令人啼笑皆非,我为四季宾馆工作."他们三个都很高兴,但第四个伙伴急得像热锅上的蚂蚁,咒骂上帝并用头撞墙.他们问他有什么不对劲,他回答道:"什么不对劲?我可是在七喜公司工作呀!"

Answer 2

In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."

在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭里，一位年轻女士被带到法官面前，她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单。女士向法官解释，她是一名学校老师，请求法官马上处理她的案子，以便可以赶回去上课。法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠，说道：“你是学校的老师，对吗？女士，我马上要实现我毕生的愿望了。在那张桌子旁坐下，写‘我开车闯了红灯’500遍。

参考资料：http://www.hxen.com/englisharticle/duanwen