给我一些英语幽默笑话!越多越好!最好是带翻译的!

Question

给我一些英语幽默笑话!越多越好!最好是带翻译的!(还有另外的悬赏哦)
希望有人来回答一下!

Answer 1

Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?"

One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie."

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was."

The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.

当老师走进教室时，两个男孩在争论。
老师是说：你们在争论什么？

一个男孩回答：‘我们捡到一张10块，我们决定把它给一个说最大的谎的人。’

‘你们应该觉得羞耻’老师说，‘当我像你们那么大的时候，我连什么是说谎都不知道。’

两个男孩把钱给了那个老师。

1,Two birls

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

两只鸟

老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？

学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

老师：请说说看。

学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

2. The Fish Net

"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?"

"A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl.

鱼网

"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安？" 老师发问道。

"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。" 小女孩回答道。

He Won

Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。

选我吧

Answer 2

越多越好的带翻译的幽默笑话：
正打饭呢，儿子突然就伸一个空碗过来说：来，给爷也添碗饭！我一瞪他：小崽子你不想活了！不是他跑得快，我腿都要踢断他的。。。这时坐饭桌上我爸说话了：是我叫他添饭，你打他干什么！我。。。
经过“迅捷在线翻译”过后的内容：
As he was cooking, his son suddenly reached out an empty bowl and said, "Come on, add a bowl of rice to my father, too!" I stared at him: You don't want to live, puppy! It's not that he runs fast. I'm going to kick him in the leg. At this time, sitting at the table, my father spoke: I asked him to add rice, what do you beat him for! I...