麻烦帮我用英文翻译~

Question

1.我爱上了听东西掉落的声音，尖利的声音刺痛人的内心，那是一个美丽的伤口，形状比想象中美好。
2. 她们说我病了，死亡是唯一仁慈的方式，那么我闭上眼睛，让世界再安静一些，更晦涩一些。
3.悲伤，你总伴随我人生，我想离你远去，不再受你的折磨，而你却若即若离跟随者我，像一个我喜欢的变心的恋人那样，既不让我离去，却又不完全接纳我。当我想远去之际，你却过来，弄乱我的思绪，让我身不由己又回到你的身边，接受你的折磨。
4.真想我的床能够我去到哪就跟到哪，太舍不得家里的床了，永远都是最舒服的。
5.下次逛街我决定无论如何都要穿人字拖，穿其他鞋子累死我了。
6.昨晚梦到某人在街边卖水果，还被大卡车撞到水果满地都是，哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈、
7.昨天晚上我可能死了，我幻想看到自己的身体，甚至想要去坟墓里睡觉。天啊，太不可思议了。我总喜欢做这样的梦
8.你嫌啤酒太冰了你就加热它,如果你嫌洋酒太浓了就加点水进去，不想喝就不想喝,不要给我尽找些弱智的理由来应付我。。
9.每个人的生命中都有一个克洛伊，而我的克洛伊就是她。
10.一口气吃了八个辣椒，嘴巴都肿了、
11. 我是不是该上吊自杀然后再重新活一次。
12.要是有些事我没提起，你别以为是我忘了，我什麽也没忘，但有些事只适合收藏，不能说，也不能想，却又不能忘
13.viva forever，这首歌，我不知道听了多少年了，从来都不会听腻
14.我在卫星地图上找到了很多回忆。
15.每天都要被楼上那刺耳的声音惊醒，那简直就是一种形成慢性心脏病的过程、
16.我爸对我说“你不是人来的，你白天睡觉晚上活动，你就是个吸血鬼。我说，我还真希望我是吸血鬼。哈哈，谁不想做吸血鬼呢
17.女人.请不要为自己解释太多,请不要太伤心，在你没有遇到一个爱你的男人之前，你一定要像个爷们那样坚强的活着。
18.我肥的时候又说我像猪头，我瘦的时候又说我像白骨精，你到底想我怎样？
19.今天翻衣柜的时候我震惊的发现我以前居然是穿25裤头的牛仔裤...我以前怎么那么瘦，现在为什么那么胖
20.刚刚被洗澡的时候被朋友恶作剧反锁在浴室三个小时，我都快被冻僵了。
21.很多事情都是在预料之外,有些东西我以为一辈子也找不到了,谁知道无意中它又出现了...
22.抱歉、我没你们那麽有冲劲，没你们那麽好运气，没你们那麽看的开，也没那麽那麽多的道理
23.做了那麼多年人，才发现我不会做人、
24.我需要一只狗，来倾听我的心事，我还需要一些烟和酒，陪我度过一个晚上。
25. 我自己打了自己几巴掌，原来还是痛的，还有点晕。
26.做噩梦了,梦裏你转身就走,我跟了好几条马路,却还是隔著同样的距离,接著车辆把我撞得遍体鳞伤、
27.自己吃完了一个pizza，居然还觉得饿
28.我在想，如果让女人去操控这个世界，或许世界会变得更强大。
29.我记得很久之前，有一次，忘了什麼事情很开心了，我问你，我是在做梦麼，你捏捏我说傻瓜，你没做梦，是真的。接著，我醒了。。。
30. 我也是人，不能说不想理就不理、

Answer 1

1.我爱上了听东西掉落的声音，尖利的声音刺痛人的内心，那是一个美丽的伤口，形状比想象中美好。
I have become to like hearing the sounds of falling objects, the shape voice would make the heart feels painful. That is a beautiful wound. Its shape is more wonderful than one could think of.
2. 她们说我病了，死亡是唯一仁慈的方式，那么我闭上眼睛，让世界再安静一些，更晦涩一些。
They said I have taken ill. If deathy is the only kind way then let the world be more peaceful amd more obscure.
3.悲伤，你总伴随我人生，我想离你远去，不再受你的折磨，而你却若即若离跟随者我，像一个我喜欢的变心的恋人那样，既不让我离去，却又不完全接纳我。当我想远去之际，你却过来，弄乱我的思绪，让我身不由己又回到你的身边，接受你的折磨。
Sadness, you seem to follow my life. I want to be far away from you. But you are with me onand off all the time just like a lover of mine who had jilted me. Didn't want to let me go and would not accept me completely. When I want to go far far away and you would come over to me to confuse me, making me going back to you and be torture once again!
4.真想我的床能够我去到哪就跟到哪，太舍不得家里的床了，永远都是最舒服的。
How I wish my bed would follow me wherever I go. I just can't forget my bed at home. It is always the most comfortable one!
5.下次逛街我决定无论如何都要穿人字拖，穿其他鞋子累死我了。
Next time wne i go shopping, I shall wear flip flops regardlessly. All other shoes were making me ever so tired!
6.昨晚梦到某人在街边卖水果，还被大卡车撞到水果满地都是，哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈、
I have dreamt of someone who was selling fruits and was knocked over by a truck. All his fruit were all over the place. ha ha ha ha ha..
7.昨天晚上我可能死了，我幻想看到自己的身体，甚至想要去坟墓里睡觉。天啊，太不可思议了。我总喜欢做这样的梦
I might have been dead last night, I imagined that i could see my body and even thinking of going to sleep in thr grave! Oh my god, that was so unbelievable. I seem to dream such dreams all the time!
8.你嫌啤酒太冰了你就加热它,如果你嫌洋酒太浓了就加点水进去，不想喝就不想喝,不要给我尽找些弱智的理由来应付我。。
If you think that the beer is to cold then warm it up. If you think that the wine is too strong then add some water in it. If you don't want to drink it then don't drink it! Don't just keep giving trouble with your low IQ questions!
9.每个人的生命中都有一个克洛伊，而我的克洛伊就是她。
Everyone's life has a chloe. My chloe is her!
10.一口气吃了八个辣椒，嘴巴都肿了、
I had 8 hot chillis in a row and my mouth is now swollen up!
11. 我是不是该上吊自杀然后再重新活一次。
Do I have to hang myself to be reincarnated once again?
12.要是有些事我没提起，你别以为是我忘了，我什麽也没忘，但有些事只适合收藏，不能说，也不能想，却又不能忘
If someting I did not mentioned. Do you think that I have forgotten about them. I did not forget. But some is better to be put away. Cannot be mentioned also cannot be thought of but could never be forgotten!
13.viva forever，这首歌，我不知道听了多少年了，从来都不会听腻
The song "Viva forever", which i have been listening to for years but would never fed up with it.
14.我在卫星地图上找到了很多回忆。
I have found many memories on the satellite maps.
15.每天都要被楼上那刺耳的声音惊醒，那简直就是一种形成慢性心脏病的过程、
I always awaken by the upstairs sharp voices. That simply would be the slow process of a heart attack!
16.我爸对我说“你不是人来的，你白天睡觉晚上活动，你就是个吸血鬼。我说，我还真希望我是吸血鬼。哈哈，谁不想做吸血鬼呢
My father told me: "You are not human, sleeping at day time and active at night time. You are just a vampire!" I said: "How i wish that i am really a vampire, who would n't want to be a vampire?"
17.女人.请不要为自己解释太多,请不要太伤心，在你没有遇到一个爱你的男人之前，你一定要像个爷们那样坚强的活着。
Women, please don't explain yourselves too much. Please don't be too upset. Before you have met a man who would love you, you must be living as tough as a lord!
18.我肥的时候又说我像猪头，我瘦的时候又说我像白骨精，你到底想我怎样？
When I was fat that you would call me a pig. But when I was thin that you would call me a skeleton. How exactly would you like me to be?
19.今天翻衣柜的时候我震惊的发现我以前居然是穿25裤头的牛仔裤...我以前怎么那么瘦，现在为什么那么胖
When I was going through my wardrobe and had accidentally for a 25 inches waist jean. Why I was so thin before? Now, why I am so fat?
20.刚刚被洗澡的时候被朋友恶作剧反锁在浴室三个小时，我都快被冻僵了。
Some one just palyed a cruel joke on me by locking me in the bathroom foe 3 hours while I was having a bath. I was almost chilled to death.
21.很多事情都是在预料之外,有些东西我以为一辈子也找不到了,谁知道无意中它又出现了...
Many things would not be as you were expected. Many things you thought that would not happened in your life but who knows that it just appeared in front of you accidentally!
22.抱歉、我没你们那麽有冲劲，没你们那麽好运气，没你们那麽看的开，也没那麽那麽多的道理
Sorry, I don't have your kinds of impulsion. I am not as lucky as you all. I don't have your kind of initial advantages and also I don't have as many reasons as you have got.
23.做了那麼多年人，才发现我不会做人、
After being a human for so many years now, I realized that I don't know how to be a human!
24.我需要一只狗，来倾听我的心事，我还需要一些烟和酒，陪我度过一个晚上。
I need a dog to listen to my thoughts. I need cigarrates and alcohol to accompany passing a night.
25. 我自己打了自己几巴掌，原来还是痛的，还有点晕。
I snapped on my own face. It was actually rather painful and a bit faint(或用dizzy).
26.做噩梦了,梦裏你转身就走,我跟了好几条马路,却还是隔著同样的距离,接著车辆把我撞得遍体鳞伤、
In a nightmare, you turned back and ran in the dream and I followed you for several blocks, but the distance was still the same. Then the cars had knocked me over and I was seriously hurt!
27.自己吃完了一个pizza，居然还觉得饿
After having a whole pizza on my own and I am still feeling hungry.
28.我在想，如果让女人去操控这个世界，或许世界会变得更强大。
I have been thinking, if let women to control the world, perhaps the world would be even more powerful!

29.我记得很久之前，有一次，忘了什麼事情很开心了，我问你，我是在做梦麼，你捏捏我说傻瓜，你没做梦，是真的。接著，我醒了。。。
I remember there was once very long ago, whatever I have forgotten and still would feel rather happy. I asked you that was I dreaming? You pinched me and call me a stupid. "You did not dream. It was true" and then I woke up...

30. 我也是人，不能说不想理就不理、
I am a human too, you just can't leave me as you so wish!

终於替你完成任务了，刚刚是午夜12时! (北京时间早上8时!)。希望没有令你失望就好了!

Answer 2

不好不坏笔记本古雅思维永运梦剖肚