谁帮我改改作文啊,，，如果十分满分的话，我能得多少分？

Question

Topic: compare the advantages and disadvantages of three of the following as media for communicating information. state which you consider to be the most effective: comics, books, radio, television, film, theatre.

Recently, people focus on the effective of media for communicating information. Different people have different opinions.
Obviously, television is the most effective media to most of us. The news changed every seconds a whole day and let us know the messages. For example, CCTV , the most biggest and influenced media in China, it’s not only communicated in 30 minutes but also renews in every seconds on the bottom in the screen. Moreover, compared with the speed, radio also very fast, but a lot of people don’t have custom to listen radio, so radio couldn’t effect more people.
The second fast media is books. Because from write to print would cost more time, some messages maybe lost time. But once print in book, the knowledge would be more truly and economily compare with television.
What’s more, comics, film or theatre also can give some messages to us. They’re more lifelikeness but it will be cost more time than books, Because they must cost more time to choose, write and do the film, and they will pay more work to book writers.
With developing society , we have more choices to take massages, and choose the best way to you is more wiser to us.

Answer 1

你是高中生么？这是一篇跟雅思大作文差不多的discussion essay，如果你打算拿这个考雅思，不好意思只有4-5分，如果就是普通的高中作文的话，6-7分，因为有很多语法错误，而且你越往后写越不详细，拿不出有力的论据。

Answer 2

翻译为...............：题目:比较的优缺点,提出了以下三个information.作为媒体沟通状态,你认为最有效的:漫画、书籍、广播、电视、电影、戏剧。

最近,人们专注于有效的信息交流媒介。不同的人有不同的看法。
显然,电视是最有效的媒体,我们大多数人。这个消息秒一天更换一次,让我们知道这个消息。例如,中央电视台、规模最大的媒体和影响,它不仅是沟通中30分钟也在每一秒更新底部在触摸屏显示。此外,相比,广播电台也速度非常快,但是很多人不习惯听收音机,所以收音机不能影响更多的人。
第二个快速的传输介质的就是书籍。因为从写打印成本将更多的时间,一些信息可能失去的时间。但是一旦出版图书,知识会更真实、economily与电视。
更重要的是,漫画、电影或戏剧也会给一些信息给我们。他们更传神,但这将花费更多的时间比书籍,因为他们必须花费更多的时间选择、写字和做这个电影,他们将支付更多的工作去书的作家。
发展社会,我们有了更多的选择去按摩,去选择最好的他/她更聪明的方式向你给我们。.................................
我觉得还可以~10分吧~~

Answer 3

非常棒，10分，就是我看不懂

Answer 4

9分