能帮我修改一下英语作文吗

Question

About love and games
How do you define the game?
Some people say that games are harmful, games al is will make people addicted to them, neglect their studies. It can also harm your eyes, and your immune system may be weakened by lack of exercise. Some people say that games are beneficial. In the high pressure study or work, can alleviate the pressure appropriately. And I think games have some benefits, but we can't overdo it, just a little bit.
What about love? At if the age 15-16,is being in love beneficial or harmful? Some people say that children at this age do not know what love is, and will delay learning. Some people say, this age is the beginning of love, the most beautiful age. It is good to be guided to progress together and to grow together.

Answer 1

第二句应该把He 改为His 。第二行 everyday 要分开写every day。第三行改为：He wonder if he needs to give up his hobby.

追问

啊？

这不太对啊